Hugging My Kids More!

Hello Readers, Welcome to my crazy house blog, I don’t know about you all, but I am not a hugger or a hand shaker. I like to keep my distance, even with family and friends. Even my kids. Don’t get me wrong I love them to bits; they are my world. I’m just not a touchy-feely person.

With the pandemic, I feel I have come a long way in that aspect. I mean, I have always been very involved in my kids’ lives. I am at every appointment, soccer games, etc. I tuck them in every single night. I listen very carefully to all their stress and worries, I go beyond what most parents do, so in my mind, how could our relationship get any better?

I am a stay at home mom, but I also work from home, besides writing my blogs and hosting multiple YouTube Chanel’s. I also have a small home business, “Calm Your Monster,” so I have a taste of what working parents struggle with. Especially time. There is just never enough time in a day to get everything done. In my house, it’s usually the laundry and dishes that get pilled up.

Since the Corona Pandemic began, emotions took their toll through my crazy house. Between adapting to new routines, homeschooling, home business temporary shutting down, etc. Getting back into a groove was challenging for us. However, during the process, my parenting shifted in a different direction. I hug my kids a little more and a little tighter. How I give them attention has also changed, instead of taking them out to eat, we cook dinner together and eat together. Instead of going to the park where I watched them from a distance, we go for walks and bike rides together. Instead of letting them play hours of video games alone, I played video games with them and even created my own gaming Chanel as a result.

This week was a breakthrough. As meltdowns often occur, sometimes multiple times in a day with very violent outbursts. With my new technique I’ve been using, with my aromatherapy play-dough and art therapy center, the meltdowns have lessened a lot, and are more manageable, except for this week! This week was just insane! It was worse than it had been in a very long time. Cam’s emotions just took over him completely. He had a rage of anger that seemed to have sprouted out of nowhere. He was verbally aggressive, physically aggressive, and emotionally drained. I could see in his eyes this is not what he meant to do. I hugged him tight when he was hitting, pushing, and trying to hit me with a metal pole he took from our duster.

He fought with his sister and tormented the pets. He broke my TV, his gaming controller, and was a complete wreck. His words were heartbreaking to the point of us thinking about seeking help from authorities. What helped is that despite it all, I didn’t give up on him. We fixed his controller, and we cleaned the messes. I hugged him more than ever and told him how much I love him. I sat with him while he cried. I held him while he was pushing me away. Until he let his emotions pour out. He needed to let his feelings out to adapt to our new lifestyle. How we have changed, how I have changed along with the rest of the world. Thanks to the power of Corona. We have changed for the better.

I also discovered how the kids’ relationships with each other are growing stronger, with a bit less fighting, more negotiation and compromising. I started to notice I was also getting less frustrated with them and more understanding of their emotional needs. What I thought was perfect positive parenting when things were good, like anything else, there is always room for improvement. There is a study I recently read called “Huggable 2020 survey”. That shows the percentage of parents who also felt their relationships with their kids has improved. This study was about parents with children much younger then mine, but I still felt like I could relate, and I thought I would share it with you all, to see if you have similar thoughts and what is your take on the matter. I’d love to hear about them in the comments below.

Hear are some links to study’s I have read.

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