What Now?

Hey Guys, Welcome back to my crazy house blog, I’m so excited to see all that awful snow is finally melting away, it’s so gross! It’s cold, it’s wet it’s dirty and to be completely honest, I’m done with the boots dripping, fixing inside out snow-pants, coats, fishing for sweater sleeves, pulling out hoods, disposing yucky scrunchy tissue from pockets and looking for that one mitt that likes to run away and hide because you know they wont wear any other mitt because those ones fit all the fingers just right. #Momlifestrugles

Anyway as I was scrolling through Facebook today, I saw a post that caught my eye; it read “It’s the day after Autism Awareness Day. Now that you are aware…. What now?” from notanautismmom.com ….. You know me! I must elaborate on that because well you know my damn ADHD brain is on the hamster wheel again. So I’m going to tell you exactly what we are going to do here in my crazy house.

We are going to continue to raise awareness everywhere we go and educate everyone that we meet every single day. We will embrace the wonderful life we have. We will adjust our circumstance as they arise and learn how to be better at what we do, not for anyone else but for our house and our sanity when things get a little crazy. Because every single person on the autism spectrum or not, deserves to live in an accepting community, deserves an education and a family that loves unconditionally. #AutismFamily

Coincidentally I had a chat today about exactly why raising awareness and educating others is so important in the autism community. It started off as “What do you think changes after your child gets diagnosed?” I think as I mentioned before a diagnosis can be devastating, as part of you is in complete denial because the uncertainty is terrifying! As any parent would, you want the best life possible for your child. But a part of you is also relieved that you no longer have to pretend everything is perfect because now you have found that missing puzzle piece you’ve been searching for. Despite what others think or say you’re not a horrible parent, not everything is your fault and now you can learn to work with what you have and turn your crazy into the best journey ever that you were not fully prepared for.

Some outsiders feel that the diagnoses can ruin your child’s life because you are no longer pretending, you are no longer struggling behind closed doors, you are wiping your tears and patting your back because you made it through another day, because you immediately turn into a mama bear and you go full force into protecting your cub from all this new uncertainty. You leave no stone upturned. You do all the research you possible can, you join all the support groups #ThankyouFacebook, you go to all the appointments, you do the applied behavior analysis, you stay up all night making pec’s, you change your house around to maintain the crazy a little easier, You no longer hold back and you raise awareness anyway you can.

They ask why would you talk about your child’s diagnosis in front of your child? l never keep anything from my kids; they are too smart for that. I keep a open honest relationship so they are comfortable talking to me about anything they need to. I mean they are going to the appointments, they see the changes I’m making to better their life (they will challenge it, but they see it), they are in the therapy, they hear me raising their voice to be accepted. They know I fight for their IEP, they see my communication with their teachers. They know how many things I’ve cancelled because I knew it would be to much for them. They see me drop everything to comfort their anxieties. Why would I try to hide that? I teach my kids how to live their life the way it works for them not what works for everyone else. I teach them that being different isn’t a bad thing (honestly that took me a while to learn). I was diagnosed with ADHD and started taking med’s not long before I began writing about my crazy house. I am happy that I did, because the medication is making me a better mom, I’m more focused I have more energy, I’ve come to terms with who I am and who I want to be. That being said the main advice I have for any parent with a child with additional needs is to be completely honest with themselves and everyone else because pretending has not been proven to be successful.

I have been a strong advocate for autism awareness since my son was diagnosed 10 years ago and will continue to do so. I hope you enjoyed my blog and I’ll see you next time at my crazy house.

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